Relationships and Prayer
- prodigalsprayers
- Sep 4
- 6 min read
Our Relationships
What makes you happy? Over the years, my answers have changed. I found that maintaining good relationships with others is one of the activities that makes me the happiest. Of course, it is a two-way street; to have a relationship, others must be willing to participate and have pure motives.
An article from World Economic Forum, by Douglas Broom, reveals “scientists have found the key to a healthy, happy life: our relationships.” Those who participated in The Harvard Study of Adult Development conducted research for 85 years and reported that “it is our relationships with other people that give us the greatest happiness.” They also discovered that people with good, solid relationships are proven to live longer and are “less likely to get coronary artery disease or type 2 diabetes or arthritis.”
If surveyed, what would you list as important factors of a good relationship? Take a moment to write those down. There are no wrong answers to this subjective question. I considered this for a bit, narrowed down what came to mind, and then wrote my list of items that rank relationships higher than others. Some of yours may be the same.
Able to have discussions –hear and feel heard
Laughter or smiles
Pray together and/or for each other
Shows interest in each other’s lives and/or supports endeavors
Spend time together, sometimes doing nothing and without “pins and needles”
Feel appreciated or valuable
Present when the chips are down
Mutually undemanding
Let’s think about our relationships with our spouse/partner, co-workers, friends, neighbors, caregivers, and acquaintances. Who are the people that meet the criteria you listed? Who is number one and why?
My number one relationship is with Jesus. I know, it sounds cliché, and I asked myself why? Is it because that’s what Christians are expected to say? Initially, that might have been true. But today, I know it is because of our two-way communication, which is the central topic of most of the factors I listed. This leads me to the main topic of prayer.
Prayer
Defined
What is prayer? Webster's 1828 dictionary defines prayer as “…a solemn address to the Supreme Being, consisting of adoration, or an expression of our sense of God's glorious perfections, confession of our sins, supplication for mercy and forgiveness, intercession for blessings on others, and thanksgiving, or an expression of gratitude to God for his mercies and benefits.” Prayer defined 1828 Webster's dictionary
My definition of prayer is an intimate conversation anytime, anywhere with my Creator, praising Him, expressing my gratitude, asking for forgiveness and guidance to handle my life appropriately and to fight my sinful nature, interceding for others, and sometimes crying for what hurts my heart and allowing His presence to heal me. Many times, it is spent smiling and in complete awe of who He is and what He has done, is doing, and will do.
What does the Bible say about prayer?
The Bible says to pray if we are in trouble, happy, sick, need healing, or forgiveness. We should pray praises and pray for each other. Our prayers are to be offered in faith and with right motives. “Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. A prayer of a righteous person, when it is brought about, can accomplish much.” (James 5:13-16, James 4:3)
John 14:13 and Psalm 37:4 address asking for what is in line with God’s will can be expected and God will be glorified.
God knows what we need before we utter a sound, so our quantity of words for attention from others are unnecessary and undesired. God asks that we pray privately to Him and He will reward us. (Matthew 6:5-8) People may ask why should we pray if God knows what we need? I testify from my personal experience that prayer changes our hearts and moves us closer to God.
The context used for Matthew 18:19-20 suggests that two or more people are gathered to pray for godly answers about how to discipline someone who won’t acknowledge their sin.
Jesus Modeled Prayer
We find the Lord’s prayer in Matthew 6:9-13. Jesus began with reverence to His Father and asked for God’s will to be done. He requested that daily needs be met, for forgiveness, and help to avoid sin. Obviously, He did this to show us how to pray since He was sinless and didn’t need forgiveness. He also demonstrated praying privately and without distraction. Jesus went into the desert and mountains to be alone with His Father. We may not have access to a desert but we can turn off all the noise and lay down our electronic devices so we can give God our undivided attention.
Jesus also modeled praying with and for others. He told his disciples to pray so that they could avoid temptation while He prayed privately in proximity. He prayed for them and future believers. (Luke 22:39-41, John 17:6-24)
Sanctify them by the truth;
your word is truth. –John 17:17
Holy Spirit’s Intercession
Days when we have no words, the Holy Spirit intercedes for us. From Romans 8:26-27, we learn that when we don’t know what to pray for, the Spirit who intimately knows the will of God, speaks for us through groaning that we don’t recognize. I experienced this during the most formidable and arduous periods of my life but credit these times as moments I felt closest to God. As He transferred His strength to me, I reveled in His presence and experienced a reluctance to remove myself from His feet.
What Others Say about Prayer
In YouVersion (a Bible app for mobile phones) I read a seven-day devotional titled “Praying For Your Elephant” by Adam Stadtmiller. The second day is titled “The Spiritually Nuclear Eternal Power of Prayer” and delivers a potent message. The devil wants to discourage us from praying because he knows that “… a prayer never prayed has zero chance of ever being answered.” But take hope, he has no power to restrain our prayer’s orbit to the throne room of our Creator. Our prayers are collected and eternally in God’s presence. “… golden bowls full of incense, which are the prayers of the saints.” –Revelation 5:8
Several years ago, I read The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis who was an atheist until his late twenties or early thirties. In the book, Screwtape, a seasoned demon mentors his nephew who is a newbie demon. Their jobs are to keep new believers (patients) from living a Christian life and the goal is to prevent the new believer from praying. This is a short excerpt from pages 16-17:
“…the simplest is to turn their gaze away from Him towards
themselves. Keep them watching their own minds and trying
to produce feelings there by the action of their own wills.
When they meant to ask Him for charity, let them, instead,
start trying to manufacture charitable feelings for themselves
and not notice that this is what they are doing. When they
meant to pray for courage, let them really be trying to feel
brave. When they say they are praying for forgiveness, let
them be trying to feel forgiven. Teach them to estimate the
value of each prayer by their success in producing the desired
feeling…”
The Bible confirms that the devil is our enemy. “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came so that they would have life, and have it abundantly.” –John 10:10. Don’t be an easy mark and allow the enemy to steal your weapon. Prayer provides endurance, strength, and courage against fear, temptation or any battle that comes our way. It is also our communication pathway that strengthens our relationship with Jesus. Take time daily or multiple times a day to spend time with Him, praise Him, thank Him, request blessings for others, talk to Him about the things that we have concerns over, and yes, sometimes even laugh with Him. For it is this relationship that is the most important and eternal. Let’s flex our prayer muscles and keep building them up while becoming an on-our-knees praying people.
All Scripture is from NASB.
YouVersion, Praying for Your Elephant, The Spiritually Nuclear Eternal Power of Prayer, Adam Stadtmiller
Lewis, C. S. The Screwtape Letters. William Collins, 2012. Pgs.15-17
Great info on prayer, it's meanings in different contexts, and its importance. Something I need constant reminders of - prayer has helped me through the most difficult times in life. Thanks for good spiritual meat to chew on.
Lisa, This was a very moving message about relationships and prayer. You touched every possible dimension of prayer. God bless your ministry through the written word.